Breakfast

 In a farm in Montana, a man comes down the stairs one morning and greets his wife who's making breakfast by grabbing and squeezing her buttocks roughly.

"Y'know dear", he says, "if that thing could lay eggs, we'd could get rid of our chickens".

She looks at him with a tired smile, clearly showing her distaste at his manners but says nothing. The man proceeds to roughly grab and squeeze one of her breasts.

"Y'know dear," he adds, "If these things could give milk, we could get rid of the cows."

Quite exasperated, the woman puts down her spatula and very roughly grabs for her husbands testicules and penis. 

"Y'know DEAR," she mutters through clenched teeth, "if that THING could stay hard, we could get rid of your BROTHER!".