A
peek into Saddam's cell |
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A
small boxy glass opening on the cell door, which lends a miserly
view to the inside. Man…. this sucks! You say we going
to take a peep inside one of the world's most dreaded dictator's
cell and you can't even see a thing. Buzz off freak, you'd
say, but hang on right there buddy, because our story hasn't
even begun
Infact,
before it begins, a word of caution for the ones' with the
feeble heart. Please consult your doctor before you go through
this.
It
all started just after Saddam was moved into this cell. The
cell's candid camera caught *REM activities through its third
eye. All these movements were found to be at their active
best only during the night. After three days of extensive
peeking our third eye located the source. Guess what??? It
was his beard. And, the reason??? Well lice. Lice??? That
beats you, doesn't it. Never you mind, I too went through
the same feeling when I was briefed the first time. |
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The CIA dropped by. So did the FBI, and the lesser mortals
from the world of intelligence. They named it "Mission
Jailhouse Rock". Speculations, of all shapes and
sizes poured in. Could he be training the lice to carry
the message of jihad forward? Or, had he actually gone
through a spiritual transformation, and was planning
to make an industry out of lice breeding which in turn
could save thousands of starving monkeys out there?
There were speculations galore. And, standing face to
face with the crisis, the unanimous call of the hour
was to put the Lice Dialect Decoder (LDD) into use.
Within an hour's time a hair (LDD) was planted in Saddam's
beard. And, the rest, well of course, is going to be
history. Primarily because, this is the first forum
wherein findings of The Mission Jailhouse Rock is being
revealed. Out of the 1080 hrs. of LDD recording only
42 hrs. of vital information is being made public. Excerpts
of which are as follows:
Lice
1: Was MJ actually involved with the kid?
Lice 2: What do you mean involved with the kid, what
on earth do you expect a kid to do. A kid would be involved
with another kid. And, what's the harm in that….
Lice
X: Have you heard Puff Daddy is trying to woo Jlo back
with diamonds?
Lice Y: Am getting worked up
Lice X: But why?
Lice Y: Well Saddam hung her posters all over his palace,
Ben gave his gelled hair appearance in her video and
look at me, and I've been sitting here on my fat ass
depriving so many probable lice of their lives. |
Lice
A: Did you hear, Pamela says she has lost her appetite?
Lice B: Don't tell me, now what is she going to survive
on, …….us?
Lice A: Bozo, she's lost her appetite for sex.
Lice B: God save the world.
Coming back, and saving you guys from this nerve wrecking
exercise:-
After extended hours of brainstorming, Saddam was finally
given a shave. His beard was burnt off, as few top sleuths
believed that all these conversations were encrypted
and were beyond speculation for the time being. Off
the record, one lice still survives in the NASA laboratory.
You all know why. But, before I sign off, the most interesting
twist is that, this surviving lice seems stuck on to
one song from the Black Eyed Peas. Yes, you guessed
it right, it's Shut Up, Shut Up, Shut up…….
*Rapid
Eye Movement (REM)
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