What
am I?
THIS
USEFUL TOOL, IS COMMONLY FOUND IN THE RANGE OF 7 INCHES LONG. THE
FUNCTIONING OF WHICH IS ENJOYED BY MEMBERS OF BOTH SEXES. IS USUALLY
FOUND HUNG, DANGLING LOOSELY, READY FOR INSTANT ACTION. IT BOASTS
OF A CLUMP OF LITTLE HAIRY THINGS AT ONE END AND A SMALL HOLE AT
THE OTHER. IN USE, IT IS INSERTED, ALMOST ALWAYS WILLINGLY, SOMETIMES
SLOWLY, SOMETIMES QUICKLY, INTO A WARM, FLESHY, MOIST OPENING WHERE
IT IS THRUST IN AND DRAWN OUT AGAIN AND AGAIN MANY TIMES IN SUCCESSION,
OFTEN QUICKLY AND ACCOMPANIED BY SQUIRMING BODILY MOVEMENTS. ANYONE
FOUND LISTENING IN WILL MOST SURELY RECOGNIZE THE RHYTHMIC, PULSING
SOUND, RESULTING FROM THE WELL LUBRICATED MOVEMENTS. WHEN FINALLY
WITHDRAWN, IT LEAVES BEHIND A JUICY, FROTHY, STICKY WHITE SUBSTANCE,
SOME OF WHICH WILL NEED CLEANING FROM THE OUTER SURFACES OF THE
OPENING AND SOME FROM ITS LONG GLISTENING SHAFT. AFTER EVERYTHING
IS DONE AND THE FLOWING AND CLEANSING LIQUIDS HAVE CEASED EMANATING,
IT IS RETURNED TO ITS FREELY HANGING STATE OF REST, READY FOR YET
ANOTHER BIT OF ACTION, HOPEFULLY REACHING ITS BRISTLING CLIMAX TWICE
OR THREE TIMES A DAY, BUT OFTEN MUCH LESS.
W
H A T A M I ? ? ? ?
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